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Friday, March 05, 2004

So far so good. 

As you can now see my blog is now fully up and running - major thanks should go to Mel who sorted everything out and gave me some tips about how to understand all the crazy computer language...yay for Mel!

Over the next few weeks visitors to my blog will be treated to some despondent rants and ramblings - Of particular interest I'm sure, will be the annual Eurovision song Contest review. If any of you watched 'Making your Mind Up', you'll know that Britain has no chance of winning. They just didn't follow the Eurovision Song rules:

i) Never, never, never try to be too clever with your song - Forget all this new-fandangled "Urban" rubbish, just bash out some upbeat Europop (remember to include at least 2 key changes towards the end)
ii) That said, never skimp on the songwriting. Ensure that the lyrics are slightly silly but not too ridiculous - "She's the one from the Magical World" is good, "I'm not afraid of a blade" is plain stupid.
iii) Your Eurovision group should consist of several strange looking people, but must invariably include a set of under-dressed girls and a lone Michael Bolton lookielikey backing singer. The removal of some clothes is recommended, but not too many.
iv) Whether they be giant record decks or long ribbons props are always helpful in preoccupying the audience's attention - use accordingly.
iv) To get the crowd going utilise the entire stage - espeicially the little walkways - If you're singing a duet make it heartfelt by meeting in the middle at the end.
v) When in doubt dress up like robots and sing 'Sagapooooo, say the password'....ha,ha,ha,ha

If you have know of any other surefire Eurovision rules - let me know!



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